DT#1565
When a mother raises the bar on the possibilities of womanhood, how can a daughter not be inspired to step into her stilettos? Many powerful mothers have been straddling their portfolio as parents along with their roles as leaders across different arenas. It has not been an easy ride, but it has not been impossible because though the mothers did not have the luxury of guiding their daughters from moment to moment but more often than not, have inspired a deep admiration in their little girls.
Nita and Isha Ambani: When Nita and Isha catch up, they do so with the same joy, intimacy and honesty one finds in any mother-daughter duo. As Isha puts it, “what I like most about my mom is that she can understand without me having to say anything. We are soul mates.” The young, confident, warm and vivacious 19 year-old Isha, majoring in Psychology and Asian Study at Yale university, and her beautiful mom Nita, constantly feeling the paucity of time with her, Nita share with smile “You know we haven’t see Ishu for three whole months!”
Nita says “We are blessed to have Isha as our eldest (born just a minute ahead of Akash). Our relationship is unique and from young age we share the small joys of life and I am always by her side when she makes her big decisions.
We believe in family value system. Both Mukesh and I grew up with our middle-class values. For Mukesh and me, India and ‘Indianness’ are very important. We live and Indian life and so our children. Living with their grandparents helped them imbibe good character and morals. Our children have seen both their parents working hard and that keeps them real and grounded. For us, the values of simplicity of the heart, respecting elders, caring for others and compassion are so embedded in our family and they are uncompromising”
Isha says “I don’t think I am or was for that matter of fact ever given a chance to thing or believe that I was born with a silver spoon. My parents raised me in a very meritocratic way, where I had to deserve everything I got. My parent’s word is that last word on any matter, and all three of us respect that to the utmost degree. She continues “I know for certain in my life right now, it is that I will come home after completing my education and the only thing that will keep me away from being in is my education.
I guess aspirations and passions are tied together; one always aspires to do something that is fuelled by an underlying passion. Hopefully, I will be able to track down a passion, and make it my aspiration.
Nita says “Our daily conversations, whether long or short, get us closer each day. Over the years, the nature of bonding has changed. When started with storybooks have slowly evolved into more enlightened discussion. As she grew I saw her becoming more objective and developing a mature outlook. When she was studying at school, our conversations used to be so much about her school life and she used to often share with me new and young perspectives. Both of us love shopping together and can’t stop without each other”
Isha says “I think we both love clothes and shoes. So anything to do with that is a blast!!! I can’t choose anything for myself and I like to believe that she can’t choose anything without me. Mom and I are pretty similar: It’s funny but many times when we are asked to make decisions in different situations, we end up making the same one, and everyone is always startled, because usually these aren’t about choosing one from the other.”
Nita says “Oh, we all love the wild life. As the first opportunity we just take off into the wild and spend time amongst the wonders of nature. In fact we have been doing this so often that even the animals must be saying “Oh, look, the Ambanis are back” But the tranquility and the sheer magic of the wild is what we enjoy most”
Isha’s strength of conviction delights me. Recently while watching soap she shut off the television when the protagonist was talking about the futility of educating girls. Isha and I become indignant at such limiting ways of depriving girls of their opportunities to blossom. We both are pained to hear about female foeticide. She has seen me putting up Dhirubhai Ambani International School from scratch. She believes in equality of opportunities in education.”
Nita if you found out she had a boyfriend, how would you react? Isha what do you think upsets your mom the most?
Nita says “I keep saying to my children that I am their friend. However, I am their mother first. So the line is drawn and they know that. They have been brought up with our family values. They have their freedom and personal space within the larger context of our family values and the evolving world order”
Isha says “She gets annoyed when I waste time – I should always be on the go all the time in her eyes. She’s very particular about respecting elders and little things like eating healthy and exercising. All the time, I think we are each other’s confidantes.”
Nita says “She is Papa’s favorite and mom’s delight. A thinker and a doer, with a quiet but strong persona; A believer in the power of education and technology in transforming the world. An advocate of women’s power; An amazing painter; An enthusiastic and evolving leader. Her grandfather used to affectionately call her daahi-dikari which means my good daughter.”
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This blog I have written in year 2011.
Yogesh Dawda 